Good news for fat bastards everywhere…or at least the ones doing the Five Peaks race in Breckenridge, April 9. I posted a blog last week announcing a complete guarantee of total domination, courtesy me and my teammate, Andy Hampsten. After several days of interviews (in several languages with periodicals around the globe), I revisited the site to check on some rules…and lo and behold, they’d posted a revised course.
Seems Peak 10 is a no-go this year, which will save us some pain in the first half of the race. It might also allow Mike Kloser a bit longer view of me and Hampstar disappearing into the clouds, angels and virgins serenading us as we alight upon blessed wings.
Or Hampsten performing CPR on my vomit-covered face with hecklers throwing poo at us.
One never knows. At any rate, the course is quite a bit different and a bit more balanced. Instead of a soul-crushing climb at the start, it’s merely a 4100-foot deathslog, followed by some hard, shorter efforts…mmm, does this change our strategy at all? Wait, our strategy is survival…that’s right.
See you in April, Kloser!
